Glee: Vitamin-D
November 9th 2010 21:54
Noticing the kids’ lack of enthusiasm in learning their new choreography, Will (Matthew Morrison) stops and asks them what’s going on. Mercedes (Amber Riley) speaks up for the whole club, “Sectionals are gonna be a breeze.” “Maybe so,” he answers, “but if we coast through Sectionals, we’re gonna get killed in Regionals. We have got to be on our game.” Kurt (Chris Colfer) suddenly bursts into laughter, and it’s clear no one is paying any attention.
Later on at lunch, Will tells Emma, “The kids have gotten really complacent. It’s like their fire’s totally gone out.” Trying not to laugh and totally distracted by the mustard on Will’s chin, she tells him about it, and when he can’t get it himself, reaches over with her gloved hand to wipe it off.
“There.” She stares at him.
He stares at her. “Thanks.”
Quickly changing the subject, Emma asks when this all started to happen, the complacency with the kids, and he tells her that it was about a week ago, just after he told them their competition for Sectionals: School for the Deaf in Dayton, and a halfway house for girls. The kids are super excited. “People who can’t hear what they’re singing,” Artie (Kevin McHale) says, “And criminals who don’t care? It’s gonna be a cake walk!” He lifts his hand for a high-five, but no one returns it, they’re all too busy high-fiving everyone else. Will’s afraid that now they’re all so sure they can win they’ve stopped trying. He’s got to find some way to motivate them. Emma suggests a stickerboard, and suddenly Sue (Jane Lynch), who’s sitting a table over, can’t take it anymore. “Please, stop talking. I’m trying desperately to ignore the trickly sweet inanity of your asinine conversation but now I’ve got bile in my mouth. I will hold my tongue no further.” She stands up, showing him her clipboard and telling Will that every week she randomly picks one of her Cheerios and kicks them off the team. When Will tells her they do things differently in Glee, she points out, “And how’s that goin’ for you?” She tells him if he wants his kids to work, he’s gotta find that competitive edge within them. Grabbing her clipboard, Sue stands up. “Ellen,” she tells Emma, “that blouse is just insane.” Sue leaves.
Glancing down at her shirt, Emma mumbles, “I can’t believe she’s allowed to teach at this school.” She goes back to her food, but Will realizes, “She may have a point.”
Back with the kids, Will announces, “Competition!” He puts up pictures of things that compete against each other: presidents, animals, “Every one of these people or elements are a champion in their own right, but they made competing with each other to make themselves even better.”
Kurt frowns at the board. “I don’t understand how lightning is in competition with an above-ground swimming pool.”
Will splits up the guys and girls and gives them their week’s assignment: “Two teams, boys versus girls. One week from today, you’ll each perform a mash-up of your choice.” Boys will go Tuesday, girls the next. He wants them to go all out, costumes, choreography, everything. Whoever wins gets to pick their songs for Regionals. He tells them there will be a celebrity judge. The girls are sure they’ve already got it in the bag. The boys aren’t going to back down that easily. Will notices Finn dragging and asks him if he’s okay. Yeah, just tired. Finn heads out to football practice.
Sue sits at her desk writing in her journal: Dear Journal, feeling listless again today. It began at dawn when I tried to make a smoothie out of beef bones, breaking my juicer. And then at cheerios practice—disaster!” Sue spots a quiver in the cheerleading pyramid, and writes in her journal that she’s worried. If they lose, they lose their endorsements, “And without those endorsements, I won’t be able to buy my hovercraft.” When Sue asks Quinn if she’s okay, Quinn says she’s just tired from Glee Club. “GLEE club,” Sue writes heavily in her journal, disdainfully spatting the name in her voiceover, “Every time I destroy that clutch of scab-eating mouth breathers, it only comes back stronger like some sexually ambiguous horror movie villain. Here I am, about to turn 30, and I’ve sacrificed everything only to be shanghaied by the bi-curios machinations of a cabals of doughy misshapen teens. Am I missing something journal? Is it me? Of course it’s not me, it’s WILL SCHUESTER—“ she underlines the name twice. “What is it about him, journal? Is it the arrogant smirk? Is it the store-bought home perm? You know what journal, I noticed something yesterday…” (slow-motion flashback to Sue watching Emma and Will) “Of course,” she writes, “it’s becoming clear to me now. If I can’t destroy the club, I’ll have to destroy the MAN!”
Bent on destroying Will, Sue visits Terri (Jessalyn Gilsig) and plants the seed of doubt in her mind. Terri’s not so sure, and Sue tells her, “It’s not a full-blown affair, well it’s certainly heading in that direction. You need a machete to cut through the haze of lust that surrounds them.” Terri is horrified, what should she do? Sue suggests packing up and moving out of the district. “Unless you want to lose your man to a mentally ill ginger pygmy with eyes like bush baby.” Sue tells Terri that they have an opening for a school nurse (theirs “accidentally” (as in Sue tripped her) took a fall down the stairs yesterday), and even though she’s not a nurse, Sue assures her she’ll be fine. Terri applies and eventually talks Principal Figgins (Iqbal Theba) into giving her the judge.
In the teacher’s lounge, Will tells Emma that she’s going to be the Glee-off judge, because she’s the most honest, impartial person he knows. Suddenly Terri appears, much to Will’s surprise, and introduces herself to Emma. “I’m Terri Schuester, Will’s pregnant wife.” She reaches over to wipe the lipstick off Emma’s cup. Emma stares horrified at her newly germified cup and alarmed, Will watches her out of the corner of his eye to make sure she’s okay as he asks his wife if everything’s okay, because, well, she never visits him at work…Terri tells him about her new job. “But, you’re not a nurse,” Will answers. “You don’t have any training.” She counters, “It’s a public school.” Isn’t it great? She’ll be around all the time now! Emma is still too shocked to say anything and just stares at Will wide-eyed.
As Finn falls asleep in both football and Glee, he realizes he’s way too burned out and seeks help from the school nurse. As the guys work to make sure the girls don’t beat them, all the girls but Rachel are so sure they’re going to win they vote on winging it. Rachel isn’t so sure that’s a good idea.
When Finn shows up in her new office, Terri finds out he’s dating Quinn and, since she’s not really a nurse, ends up giving him Pseudoephedrine, because that’s what helped keep her awake when she was in high school. He goes back to the choir room totally hyper, “Let’s go through the number then build a house for Habitat for Humanity!” When the other guys wonder what kind of vitamin he’s on, he announces, “Vitamin D! And I got you guys some!” He tosses them some boxes.
They perform their mash-up (“It’s my Life/Confession”) with renewed energy, and Will and Emma are surprised and impressed. The girls look at each other. Uh-oh. Maybe they’ll have to work at this after all.
Rachel finds Finn in the hallway at her locker and brings up the fact that she’s been missing Glee. Rachel tells her that even though everyone expects them to be enemies, she doesn’t hate her. She tries to convince Quinn to come back, because when everyone else in her life turns against her when they find out her big secret, she’s going to need Glee. Quinn admits that she would have tortured Rachel if the roles were reversed, but Rachel knows that. She still thinks Quinn should come back.
Terri calls Howard (Kent Avenido) up on the phone and asks him for a favor. She’s going to need lots and lots of Pseudoephedrine. Ken Tanaka (Patrick Gallagher) appears in Terri’s door and mentions his worry that Emma is in love with Will. Terri tells them they need to come up with a plan so she can get out of this school. “I’m not meant to work five days a week.” She convinces Ken that he needs to propose to Emma, and he needs to do it now.
Determined not to be humiliated, Rachel calls the girls together to come up with a plan. They learn from Kurt that the boys all took something, and Rachel confronts Finn in the hall, “Cheater!” He tells her that she has no idea the type of pressure he’s on, but she argues that they’re all under pressure, but she motivates herself the natural way, setting a goal and not stopping before she gets it! “Winning by cheating,” she argues, “Isn’t winning!” Finn still thinks they’re going to win. “Deal with it.”
Unsure, the girls line up in Terri’s office. She gives them all vitamin D. She also gives some to Ken, who Will notices is acting very strangely lately, and when Terri tells him about his new vitamin regiment, asks, “Is that safe?” She assures him it is, it’s over the counter. Suddenly spotting some mustard on his lip, Terri glances at Emma then leans in to lick it off.
“Jeez Terri!” Will interrupts, pulling away and wiping off the mustard himself. “This is my work place.” She tells him her baby hormones are going crazy for him, but he points out that being together 24/7 isn’t good for their marriage. They used to come home and talk about their day and now, well, now they just have nothing to say to each other. (Cut to dinner: “There were a lot of ants on the sidewalk today.” Long pause. “Pretty late in the season for that.”) Will gets up to go to the bathroom, she jumps up, “I’ll go with you!”
“No!” he replies, “I love you, but I need my space.” Exasperated, Will walks out.
Terri tells Ken now’s his chance, and Ken gets up, walks over to Emma, and proposes. “Look Emma, I know you have this thing about being clean. Now I can’t promise to pick up my underwear or squeegee the shower door, but I can promise to keep your life clean of sadness,” he says, on one knee. “And loneliness, and any other dark clouds that might float into it.” He opens the ring box. “It’s cubic zirconium, I know how effected you were by Blood Diamond. Emma Pillsbury, M&M…will you marry me?”
Emma can only stare at him.
Back in the choir room, the girls perform their mash-up (Halo/Walkin’ on Sunshine), and are just as hyped as the boys. “I don’t know what you guys did, but whatever it was, keep doing it!” Will says happily, having no idea that his wife is drugging his students. Taking a walk with Emma, he thanks her for helping him come up with the motivating idea, then stops. “So,” he asks, “Is it true about Ken asking you to marry him?” It is. She asks him if he can think of any other reason she shouldn’t marry him, and after a long moment, he replies, “Is that any reason to marry someone?”
“That’s not what I’m asking,” she whispers, and as they stare at each other, Terri spots them. She is not happy. Terri approaches Emma in her office later on and flat out says, “You have no chance with my husband.” Emma stares at her a moment, then politely tells her, “Terri, Will is a good man. He’s kind, he’s generous…and he deserves a lot better than you.”
“Emma,” Terri answer condescendingly, “Will is my husband.” She calls Emma an innocent little dove, so innocent that she’d steal a man away from his pregnant wife. Emma looks down. “Do yourself a favor,” Terri continues. “Marry Ken Tanaka.” She points out that he too is kind and generous, finishing with, “And he’s available.” With that, Terri turns and leaves. Emma closes her eyes, sinking quietly back into herself.
In the hallway, Quinn catches Terri and tells her she needs to talk. About the baby. She’s been thinking about Terri’s offer, and she’s been thinking about her life, how she likes being a cheerleader and, even though she can’t believe she’s admitting it, she likes being in Glee. Quinn agrees to give Terri her baby, but makes Terri promise that Mr. Schuester will never find out. Quinn doesn’t want to hurt him anymore than she wants to hurt Finn. She also asks Terri for some money for things like maternity clothes, but Terri just scoffs. She’s going to be paying for the baby for 18 years, she’s sure Quinn can do it for nine months.
It takes a lot for her to do so, but Emma manages to force herself to walk into the locker room to ask Ken what being married to him would mean. She’d like to keep her last name and continue to live in separate houses. In fact, she thinks it’d be good if they kept it “sort of like a secret marriage.” Ken admits it’s a better deal than he thought. She tells him that he’s a good man and she doesn’t want to spend the rest of her life alone. “So…” he asks hesitantly, “is that a yes?”
Finn confronts Rachel about taking Vitamin D and they both agree that it was a bad idea and they feel bad for cheating. They agree neither of them should win.
In Principal Figgins office later on, Will looks over at his wife, unable to believe what she’s done. “You gave drugs to my kids?!” She argues that they were just over the counter pills, and they would have found a way to get them anyway, but Will is horrified. “No, no they wouldn’t,” he says. “These are good kids!”
Principal Figgins tells them that Howards was arrested, picked up by the feds on suspicion of running a crystal meth lab. Will still can’t believe his wife. “How are we supposed to raise a baby if you can’t even take care of a group of teenagers?” he asks, at a loss. “You are oblivious to consequences.” She pouts, telling him she was just trying to help, but he answers, “Don’t! Every time I light a fire in my life, you find a way to make sure it burns the forest down.” Principal Figgins asks Terri to resign as school nurse. She’s okay with that, she was working too hard anyway. Terri gets up, and when Will gets up to follow her out, Figgins calls him back to question his role in the matter. Will reminds him that he had no idea what was going on, and that’s Figgins’s point. He tells Will he’s bringing in someone to co-chair the Glee Club.
Back in the choir Rachel and Finn apologize for the whole club. “We’re really sorry Mr. Schue.” “We didn’t mean to get you in trouble.”
“I’m really disappointed in you guys,” he answers sadly. “Glee is supposed to be about what’s inside your heart, not what’s coursing through your veins.”
They know, and they’re happy to put this episode behind them. Unfortunately, that’s not going to happen. “We’ve been assigned a co-director,” he tells them.
“Who?”
“Hey kids!” Sue walks in, happy as ever to be coming onboard as co-captain. No one knows what to say.
As Will leaves the choir room later on, Emma stops him. “Will?” She walks over. “I wanted you to, um, hear this from me…” He waits for her to continue. “You know Ken asked me to marry him…I said yes.”
Will stares at her. “That’s…that’s great,” he answers, even though they both know that’s not true. They stare at each other.
A definitely sadness hangs in the air between them, and Emma can’t meet his gaze. Finally, she nods and walks off. Will opens his mouth to say something, but closes it and starts down the hall in the other direction. He stops. She stops. They turn to look at each other a long moment, then both continue on.
At home, Rachel looks at the box of Vitamin D, throws it in the trash, then flips on the radio and gets on with her usual workout. In front of her is a big star-studded sign: SECTIONALS
1. Bon Jovi/Usher - It's My Life/Confessions Pt. 2
2. Beyonce/Katrina & the Waves - Halo/Walking on Sunshine
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