Glee: Hairography
November 11th 2010 00:35
Concerned that Sue’s leaking their set lists to the other competing Glee Clubs, Will (Matthew Morrison) takes Emma’s (Jayma Mays) advice and goes to visit the Jane Adams School for Girls, where their choir director, Grace Hitchens (special guest star Eve) tells him that just because her kids are arsonists and thieves, that doesn’t mean their cheaters. Does he know that they don’t even have an auditorium? Or costumes? Feeling bad, Will invites them to practice in his auditorium, where, after watching the girls’ “Bootylicious” performance, he starts to worry about the competition.
Thinking it over in the night, Will comes back to school with a new plan. They’re going to do the title song in “Hair”. He’s brought wigs. Concerned, Rachel pulls her teacher aside and reminds him that they don’t need hairography. Will admits that the Jane Adams girls did worry him a little bit. They’re going to need to pull out all the stops if they’re going to win at Regionals. Sue spots all the wigs and demands Will not use them. She tells him that there’s a reason she makes her Cheerios wear their hair in a ponytail, and that’s because she doesn’t want anything to distract from their impeccable talent.
Meanwhile, Quinn(Dianna Agron) is starting to wonder if maybe it’s not that she doesn’t want to keep her baby, but maybe that she doesn’t want to keep it with Finn. In an effort to distract Finn to take Puck (Mark Salling)for a test drive, Quinn enlists the help of Kurt (Chris Colfer) (who takes some convincing: “Rachel somehow manages to dress like a grandmother and a toddler at the same time.”), to give Rachel a “Grease” make-over. Why the black cat suit? Because Kurt knows that’s exactly what Finn DOESN’T like in a girl.
Quinn decides she wants to keep her baby, and while she and Puck babysit Terri’s sister’s crazy kids (they’re hoping they’ll change her mind about wanting to keep her own), getting tied up in a game of Cops and Robbers, but then miraculously getting them all to pay attention while they do a “live music video”, Finn goes over to Rachel’s to get some hair tips. The guys need some wig help. When he gets there though, Rachel flips on the music and comes out of the bathroom all make-uped, big-haired, and black-leathered out.
Finn does a double take, and after a few moments, finally stops her. He asks her what’s up with her new look, and when she tells him that’s what she thought he liked, he tells her it’s not. He actually likes the way she usually dresses. Feeling like a fool, Rachel shrinks away. Finn leaves. The next day at school Rachel confronts Kurt. He set her up! Only then does she realize that Kurt likes Finn too, and argues that no matter what happens, at least she’ll be a better choice than Kurt, “because I’m a girl!”
After having fun babysitting with Puck, but then finding out that Puck was sexting with Santana (Naya Rivera) the whole time, Quinn visits Terri to tell her that she can have her baby. “A girl really needs a good father,” she says sadly. “And the only way she’s gonna get that if I give her to you.” Tearfully, Quinn asks, “You think Mr. Schue’s gonna be a good father, don’t you?” Terri doesn’t have to think about it twice. “I think he’s gonna be an amazing dad.” Will walks in, surprised to see Quinn there, and Terri quickly tells him that they were “exchanging pregnancy war stories”. Quinn gets up to leave, then hesitates in front of Will. “Yes?” he asks, sensing she wants something. Suddenly she hugs him. Surprised, he hugs her back, looking at his wife and wondering what’s going on. Terri just shrugs. Quinn pulls back. “Later Mr. Schue.” She leaves.
With all the smoke and mirrors going on with the kids, Terri realizes she needs something to distract Will from the non-baby she’s carrying, and finds an old car like the one he used to have in high school for Will to work on. It works. Will excitedly throws himself into the car, but when Terri’s sister’s husband points out that he can’t put a baby seat in that thing, Will finishes the car, sells it to some kid who will be able to use it, and uses the money to buy a van for his family. “I love you, and our little girl,” he tells his wife. “And I don’t want anything to distract me from you guys.”
When Mr. Rumba (Michael Hitchcock),the choir director for the School for the Deaf, finds out that Will invited the Jane Adams kids to his school, he feels left out. Apologizing, Will invites his kids to perform as well. When New Directions performs their Hair number for Mr. Rumba’s kids, they don’t really know what to think. Looking at each other, they sign that they look insane with all that wig tossing and crazy dancing. When it’s their turn to perform “Imagine”, the New Directions kids get up to join them, learning how to sign. Will is touched.
Realizing he made a mistake, Will tells them to forget the hair, the wigs, the crazy dancing. Sue and Rachel were both right, they don’t need hairography. “That isn’t who they are.” He passes off his set list to Sue, along with the new addition.
With both the rival choir directors in her office, Sue hands over Will’s set list: “Don’t Stop Believing”, “Proud Mary” in wheelchairs. “Now I suggest you take these two songs, split them between your two groups, and I’ll pull some strings and make sure Schuester and his kids perform last. That way it’ll look like he stole the songs from you.” The two directors look at each other. “Um, who do you think I am?” Miss Hitchens asks, to which Sue answers, “That’s a very good question, because I’ve forgotten both your names.” “Look,” Miss Hitchens continues, “I spend every waking hour of my day trying to teach those girls that lying and cheating is not the way you’re ever gonna get ahead. And you’re suggesting that I do that so that they can win a singing competition?”
“Yeah, pretty much.” Sue convinces both directors to, “Never let anything distract you from winning. Ever.” What do the Jane Adams girls have outside the choir? And how many deaf schools have won this competition? None.
In the choir room, Will passes out the new music. They’re not going to dance, no false theatricality. “We’re just going to sit in them. And sing.” Rachel thanks him. Their rendition of “True Colors” proves that they’ve got what it takes inside them. They don’t need the smoke and mirrors.
1. Destiny's Child - Bootylicious
2. Madonna - Papa Don't Preach
3. Beyonce/"Hair" - Mashup: Crazy in Love/Hair
4. John Lennon - Imagine
5. Cyndi Lauper - True Colors
6. Dionne Warwick - Don't Make Me Over
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