Glee: Audition
January 15th 2011 21:05
After a tough loss at Regionals, the glee club is back as the underdogs of McKinley High. When the school is faced with even more budget cuts, Mr. Schuester pushes the kids to help recruit new members for the club. Rachel and Finn disagree on new recruits, and aren't sure they will be able to come together in perfect harmony.
-FOXQUOTES
Sue: Will, let me break it down for you. High school's a dry run for the rest of your life. Not everyone can be champions; not everyone should be champions. The world needs fry cooks; bus drivers...
~*~*~
Rachel: We need chorus glee club members, people to stand behind me with wet eyes while I sing solos.
~*~*~
Brittany: People thought I went on vacation but I really spent the summer lost in the sewers.
~*~*~
Sue: Female football coach, like a male nurse? Sin against nature.
~*~*~
Coach Beiste: You're all coffee and no omelet.
Sue: That doesn't make any sense.
~*~*~
Sue: The two of you are making a mistake, the likes of which have not been seen since the Mexicans sold Manhattan to George Washington for an upskirt photo of Betsy Ross.
~*~*~
Sue: Boobs McGee, you're demoted to the bottom of the pyramid, so when it collapses, your exploding sandbags will keep everyone safe from injury.
~*~*~
Sue: A person that has to pump her naughties full of gravy to feel good about herself clearly doesn't have the self-esteem to be my head cheerleader.
~*~*~
Sue: I don't need the sound of your stretch marks rubbing together.
~*~*~
Sue: You make not trying to destroy glee club easy because you're doing such a bang-up job yourself.
~*~*~
Mercedes: Is that a men's sweater?
Kurt: Fashion has no gender.
~*~*~
Puck: Dude, your mouth is huge. How many tennis balls can you fit in there?
Sam: I don't know. I've never had balls in my mouth. Have you?
~*~*~
Kurt: Here's a comment to anyone that posts a message to your blog: say what you wanna say to my face!
~*~*~
Finn: Rachel is what you'd call a controlist.
Rachel: I'm controlling. Controlist isn't a word.
~*~*~
Tina: You ignored me for weeks this summer.
Artie: I was playing a marathon game of Halo, woman.
~*~*~
Artie: They fell in love over the summer, at Asian camp.
~*~*~
Coach Beiste: Everyone told me that Sue was the school bully and you were really nice. Guess they got that half right.
~*~*~
Sue: One girl ate a pigeon. That's how badly they wanna be Cheerios.
1. Jay-Z, Alicia Keys - "Empire State of Mind"
2. Dreamgirls - "Listen"
3. Travie McCoy, Bruno Mars - "Billionaire"
4. Lady Gaga, Beyoncé - Telephone
5. A Chorus Line - "What I Did For Love"
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