Bones: A Night at the Bones Museum
March 4th 2010 21:10
Bones agrees to a date with Booth’s boss, making it awkward for Booth in more ways than one. Case-wise, they find a man hung up on an electric fence who turns out to be an Egyptian mummy who was on loan to the Jeffersonian. When the exhibit curator is murdered, they have a modern-day murderer to catch. Meanwhile, Sweets gets Bones to agree to have Daisy back on a 24-hour trail basis. She’s going to work on not being so enthusiastically talkative about everything. Bones’s amazing archeological find about the Egyptian royal Anak, "The boy with the bleeding heart" (he didn't kill his brother like history thought), gets her giddy like Daisy (much to everyone’s shock), and when the museum holds a gala in honor of Bones and company, Booth asks her why she didn’t take the Assistant Director to it. That's what she said she was going to do, right? “Well I was, yes,” she answers as they’re all dressed up and alone before her big talk. “But…you and I, this was our case, and I guess…what goes on between us, that should just be ours. Isn’t that what you said?”
AD Hacker: Agent Booth.
Booth: Assistant Director Hacker.
~*~*~
Bones: Oh, ‘The Mummy’, 1932.
Cam: You don’t know Britney Spears, but you know this movie.
Bones: It’s what made we want to be an anthropologist.
~*~*~
Daisy: Dr. Brennan?
Bones: I know who the mummy is!
~*~*~
Daisy: Why are you here?
Sweets: The movie, I’m just watching the movie.
Daisy: So I’m like some kind of experiment that you need to supervise?
Sweets: No! I just thought if you needed--
Daisy: Do I look stupid? Because I’m not, Lance. In fact, there’s lots of people who think I’m scary smart. (walks off mutters) Not about men, apparently.
~*~*~
Bones: We should get the key
(Booth busts down the door)
~*~*~
Angela: Death shall come on swift wings to he who disturbs the peace of the mummy.
Cam: I guess I’d be angry too if someone pulled my brain out through my nose and stuck it in a canopic jar.
~*~*~
Angela: A red-headed boy peed on her eye?
Cam: Well, not exactly.
~*~*~
Booth: So I did a little checking on Hacker by the way. 42, never been married, just in case you’re interested.
Bones: Late marriage is often an indicator of a discerning, goal-oriented individual. Why is this a problem for you, Booth?
Booth: Ah, because he’s my boss, and if you’re gonna go out with Hacker, you guys are gonna talk about me.
Bones: Why would I talk about you?
Booth: Because I’m what you’ve got in common.
Bones: If you’re concerned that I’d discuss any perceived shortcomings—
Booth: Shortcomings? What Shortcomings?
Bones: Honestly, Booth, Andrew and I are attracted to each other, I’m sure neither of us will think of you for a second.
~*~*~
Hacker: So, what do you want to eat after this appetizing conversation?
Bones: Uh, Booth likes to get the meatloaf. He has them take out the hardboiled egg because his mother used to tell him it was a human eyeball. (laughs)
Hacker: I gotta say, you and Booth, it’s an unlikely partnership.
~*~*~
Hacker: I’m impressed you know a Stratocaster is.
Bones: Yes, I had a victim who was beaten to death with one.
~*~*~
Bones: He’s Booth’s boss’s boss. His name is Andrew.
Angela: Wait, this is his boss’s boss? Was Booth upset?
Bones: Yes, I don’t know why.
Angela : Brennan, this could screw up the natural order of things. And Booth wishes that you were going out with him.
~*~*~
Sweets: Uh, okay, Dr. Saroyan, I’m having some serious problems with Daisy. Can I ask your advice?
Cam: No.
Sweets: No, really.
Cam: Really. I have a sixteen-year-old, and believe me, when it comes to dating advice, I am batting a red-hot zero.
Sweets: But you’ve been through this like a million times yourself.
Cam: Did you just call me old?
Sweets: Is that what it felt like?
Cam: Yeah.
Sweets: You see, I can’t help it. I alienate every woman I talk to, no matter how pure my motives!
~*~*~
Hacker: I just don’t want to make a fool out of myself if Temperance is only going out with me because I’m the boss.
Booth: Alright, listen, Sir, Bones doesn’t feel the pressure to act or do or say anything that she doesn’t want to. And no one, no one, can make her. That’s what makes her…Bones.
~*~*~
Daisy: Was I too hard on Lance?
Hodgins: Focus, Daisy.
Daisy: Okay, but you’re a man. Lance is so cute isn’t he?
Hodgins: Yeah, that’d be a question for a woman.
~*~*~
Bones: What’s this?
Booth: What does it look like?
Bones: An egg.
And when was the last time that you recently talked about an egg?
Bones: Oh…
Booth: Oh.
Bones: Well he asked me what was good to eat and I mentioned that you liked the meatloaf.
Booth: Stop. Right there. You said that you weren’t going to talk about me, and you talked about me.
Bones: But I-I didn’t mean to talk about you, I told him I didn’t want to, but I like that story, and I guess it just popped out.
Booth: Popped out? I don’t need Hacker knowing about my mother’s meatloaf.
Bones: Why are you so upset?
Booth: Because, what goes on between us, is ours.
Bones: Come on Booth, you must have told a lot of people the meatloaf story, right?
(Booth doesn’t answer)
~*~*~
Sweets: You’re so beautiful, Daisy, and I promise that if you ever fail in the future I will do absolutely nothing but just give you a hug.
Daisy: That’s the nicest thing you’ve ever said to me. And I really do love the breathing exercises…So, do you want to be my Lancelot again?
Sweets: Raar.
Daisy: You know that drives me crazy.
Sweets: Raarrrr!
~*~*~
Booth: This is so cool!
~*~*~
Booth: You know, I’ll tell you what. If I was Egypt, I’d throw you a party too.
Bones: (laughs, takes a deep breath) I have to speak. I hate these things.
Booth: What are you talking about, Bones? You’re great at these things. Listen, you changed history, how many people can say that?
Bones: (laughs) You can! Every arrest you make changes history. You make the world safer.
Booth: With your help. (Bones smiles) So, Andrew, I thought you were gonna take him to this thing, that’s what he told me.
Bones: Well I was, yes, but…you and I, this was our case, and I guess…what goes on between us, that should just be ours. Isn’t that what you said?
(they stare at each other)
Booth: Yeah…
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